i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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