Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
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