Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
