i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize