How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
