Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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