i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Randomize
