found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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