You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
my being single is dangerous.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Randomize
