Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
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