Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Randomize
