Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
