She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
