so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
