I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
