? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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