he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
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