oh god the rape fog is back!
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
this will be a night to untag.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize