And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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