he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
We had sex on a dog bed..
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Randomize
