I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize
