I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize