hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I need to calm my uterus...
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
