All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
