I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
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