What a fucking waste of an outfit
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
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