Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Randomize
