Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
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