he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
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