So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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