we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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