guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
that may or may not have been my penis.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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