So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
