I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Randomize
