just tell him i said nine months
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Randomize
