You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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