my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
