hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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