i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
