Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
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