Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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