Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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