another moral hangover. fuck.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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