do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
