jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
