that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
