yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Shitshow foam night was such a success
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
