Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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