Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
