you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
